25 Characteristics of A Narcissistic Mother - What are they like? - Do you have a mother who always prioritizes herself over you and is never present? Does she constantly berate you and make you feel like you can never succeed? If this is the case, you may have a narcissistic mother.
Mothers are considered to have the greatest amount of unconditional love and selflessness.
Every rule has exceptions. Some mothers are the exact opposite of what a ideal mother should be.
These mothers can alienate your relationships with family and friends and make your life unbearable. If you were unfortunate enough to have a narcissistic parent, your life would be similar to or worse than before.
- How Does A Narcissistic Mother Mother Behave
- What Narcissistic Mothers Do to Their Daughter
- What are The Signs You Were Raised by a Narcissistic Mother?
- 25 Characteristics of A Narcissistic Mother
- Bottom Line
As your parent and guardian, your mother has a significant role in the development of your child from the very beginning. If the mother's mental state is deficient, she will not fulfill her obligations. This has a negative effect on the child in multiple ways; the psychological damage is the most severe and long-lasting.
The long-term effects of this injury can be felt even after the child has grown into an adult.
How Does A Narcissistic Mother Behave?
What Narcissistic Mothers Do to Their Daughter?
What are The Signs You Were Raised by a Narcissistic Mother?
- Conversations are always centered around them instead of you.
- They claimed credit for your accomplishments.
- They created conflict or drama in order to draw attention to themselves.
- They took every detail personally, even when it had nothing to do with them.
- They always had to outdo you when you achieved something.
But all is not lost for children of narcissistic parents. The first step in self-protection for a narcissistic parent is to identify their psychological condition. Because this is a mental health issue, you have to rely on behavioral patterns to do this. Watching for signs can help you recognize their narcissistic personality.
This article delves into the thinking of narcissistic mothers and highlights some common behavioral traits they share. Below are the main characteristics of a narcissistic mom for your easy reference and quick identification of narcissistic abuse.
25 Characteristics of A Narcissistic Mother
1. She doesn't respect personal boundaries.
A narcissistic mother interferes in your life and creates disturbances in it, leaving you sad and anxious. If you notice this trait in your mother, chances are she has narcissistic traits.
2. She gives you conditional love.
If your mom is making conditions while showing you affection, that should be a red flag. When these conditions are solely for her benefit, you can demonstrate that she has a narcissistic personality. When their demands are not met, narcissistic parents often get frustrated and angry, and throw a tantrum. They even show vindictive behavior.
3. She plays the sacrifice card.
The worst is when she does it consciously, on purpose, in order to keep the focus on herself. She's good at making you feel guilty or eliciting sympathy for her by changing the narrative. Even if she does or says hurtful things to you, she will blame you for misunderstanding her in turn.
4. She is good at fanning the flames.
Psychological abuse is a weapon of choice for narcissistic parents. She lies without blinking to set you on fire. She would lie about being complicit in the matter. She will criticize your emotional reactions. If necessary, she even pretended the hurtful words weren't serious; they were just said in a lighter tone.
5. Her behavior is inconsistent.
If she wants something from you, she will be nice to you. At other times, however, it will work against you. Since it's hot and cold, you may mistakenly think that your behavior is the cause of these wild swings.
You may believe that you aren't paying enough attention to her needs, this is causing her to feel bad and sad. In order to maintain her happiness, you will attempt to be on her side and lavish her with attention.
6. She is completely dishonest.
When things don't go as planned, a narcissistic mother will utilize deception and lies to cover her tracks or divert attention from the truth. They consistently strive to present an idealized image to the world.
7. She's biased.
She forces the rest of the family to assist, protect, and praise her favorite child even when they don't want to. Those who disagree with her will be subject to her wrath.
When her favorite child commits a crime, she will conceal it and let the offender off the hook. Her preferential treatment causes discord among her siblings, the favored child receives the majority of the mother's affection, others despise her as well as the child for this.
8. She is vindictive.
You'll often observe her plotting revenge on others or seeking retribution. Revenge is her primary goal when she's displeased.
9. She causes discord in relationships.
Narcissistic mothers often exploit one child against the other in order to benefit themselves personally or to please one of them. Additionally, her habit of lying without remorse is detrimental to your trust in others.
10. She doesn't respect your opinion.
If you maintain your convictions and thoughts, she will attempt to ridicule and manipulate you in order to force you to agree with her. This is difficult for those who are independent.
11. She enjoys your suffering and pain.
This is a characteristic that makes narcissistic mothers both sadistic and dangerous. She doesn't care about the damage she's causing you, at times she enjoys your pain and despair. She will discuss topics that are painful to you in order to see you struggle.
If she is caught in the act, she may justify this as a means to toughen you up or as a prank.
12. She blames you for her mistakes.
Her behavior toward you is primarily driven by the things she despises in herself.
13. She is unreliable and untrustworthy.
She deceived, shunned responsibility, and rarely fulfilled her obligations. However, she'll criticize you for your small errors. She utilizes you as a punching bag to release her anger and frustration. It's no wonder you have a hard time believing her.
14. She is clumsy and lacks proficiency.
For instance, she can't assist you in selecting the appropriate prom dress or present because she lacks a true understanding of your true self.
15. She criticizes and faults you.
She has no problem throwing you under the bus or trashing you in front of others if it benefits her.
16. She constantly compares you.
17. She is unsure and fearful.
18. She makes you assume the role of a parent.
19. She enjoys having you follow a short leash.
20. She deceives you.
21. She's adept at explaining her actions.
She is incapable of accepting criticism, positive or negative, constructive or not. Frequently, this will cause her to become enraged and lash out, she will then become spiteful when you criticize her.
22. She is selfish.
She's the type of individual who enjoys celebrating special occasions in order to remain focused. She enjoys celebrating her birthday, but when it comes to yours, she disregards it as a waste of time and energy.
23. She only treats you nicely in public.
24. She thinks you are her rival.
In order to maintain her superiority over you, she will drag you down and sabotage your chances. She'll call you vain, selfish, idiotic, and not dominant.
25. She clamps you in a vise.
Every time you attempt to escape her grasp, she becomes more agitated and violent. She will reverse the situation and accuse you of ignoring her. She will guilt-trip you to get her way.
Once you've identified that your parent is narcissistic, you can take steps to protect yourself, depending on your age, your dependency on them, and the presence of an equal or superior authority in your life.
Remember that mothers can be harmful and can adversely affect you. You have every right to protect your interests from narcissistic abuse. Attempting to reason with narcissistic parents is futile. However, this is detrimental. Try to keep a distance, if nothing else does.
Additionally, you can discuss your concerns with a trusted individual.